1. Scale back your time of possession.

　　不要老是一個(gè)人說(shuō)啊說(shuō)

　　In football, the team that holds the ball for long stretches on offense invariably wins the game. In dating, forget football Sunday. Instead of towering over the chitchat, shelve the Me, Me, Me and talk less. Unlike the star of a rowdy cable news round table, defer and listen to your guest. In the end, you’ll learn more and foul up less.

　 　在足球中,，持球防守最久的那一方總是會(huì)贏,，但在約會(huì)中,，請(qǐng)忘記足球,。與約會(huì)中與其談一下這個(gè)又談一下那個(gè),，不如不要再說(shuō)有關(guān)你自己的事而且記住少說(shuō)話,。 與那些在一大堆的人中,，很受歡迎的人相比,，你最好是等一等,，聽(tīng)一聽(tīng)對(duì)方有什么話要說(shuō)。最后,，你會(huì)學(xué)到很多,，也不會(huì)把事情弄慒,。

　　2. Offload unsportsmanlike conduct.

　　暫時(shí)將你喜歡的運(yùn)動(dòng)節(jié)目放一放

　　Unless the theme of the date is to watch the big game around a bucket of hot wings, don’t schedule a first meeting at the same time as a crucial sporting event. No lady appreciates one eye on her and the other on the bar TV scanning for the Cubs score.

　　除非你的約會(huì)主題是伴著一桶辣雞翅看大型比賽。要不然不要把你的第一次約會(huì)定在一場(chǎng)賽事開(kāi)賽的時(shí)候,。沒(méi)有一個(gè)女人會(huì)欣賞一個(gè)和她約著會(huì)卻還留著心思看吧臺(tái)上的電視的男人,。

　　3. Put Mr. Popularity on ice.

　　晾著那位“受歡迎先生”

　　One of the terms of the social contract we call a date is that while we’re both here, this is the most important thing happening. Pressing business and pet emergencies aside, silence your cell phone during a first date. Flaunting your supposed importance as a social butterflyisdownright rude, overshadowed only by the ultimate cad who flirts with a stranger while his date powders her nose.

　　在社交詞匯中,，有一句話叫做“我們的心都在這兒”，這是最重要的一點(diǎn),。將你的事情或其他的緊急事件先放一放,，將你的手機(jī)調(diào)為震動(dòng),。像一個(gè)交際花似的將你認(rèn)為重要的事情說(shuō)給對(duì)方聽(tīng)是非常不禮貌的,，其不禮貌程度僅次于一個(gè)超級(jí)花花公子正在和一位化妝的女人調(diào)情。

　　4. Lay off any leering looks.

　　別暗送秋波

　　No matter how well Pilates has sculpted her backside or how devilishlylow-cut her neckline, be different… lock your gaze above the neck line for full iris-to-iris contact. She’ll be impressed.

　　不管普拉提把她的背部和臀部塑造得有多好或她的衣領(lǐng)有多低,，表現(xiàn)地與別人不一樣,。把精神集中在她的臉部，和她進(jìn)行眼神交流,。她會(huì)對(duì)此印象深刻的,。

　　5. Enter a no-bragging zone.

　　吹一小下牛

　　Your Wall Street credentials and private jet may have been relevant info online, but boasting about your bank account in person is hardly attractive. If you are well-off, the confident tone, classic watch, and Italian shoes will wordlessly communicatethat you are a blue-chip investment.

　　你在華爾街的股票認(rèn)購(gòu)書(shū)和私人飛機(jī)也許在網(wǎng)上還查得到相關(guān)信息，但是吹噓你的銀行帳戶是不明智的,，并不會(huì)讓你有吸引力,。如果你很富有,，不用你說(shuō),，你說(shuō)話時(shí)的自信語(yǔ)氣,，用的名貴手表和意大利產(chǎn)的鞋都可以說(shuō)明你是一個(gè)一流的投資者,。

　　6. Steer clear of taboo topics.

　　避免談?wù)撘恍┟黠@禁忌的話題

　　Life lessons, exes, or your philosophicalstance on the late Jacques Derrida (Overblown fraud or grand deconstructionist? Discuss.) enliven conversation and aid in weeding out potential mates with incongruentvalues. However, a first date is not couples’ counseling or a tell-all recap of your romantic résumé. This is not the forum for discussing recent exes or any past relationship failures that involve heartache, baggage, or other drama.

　　人生教訓(xùn),，過(guò)去的感情,，或你對(duì)已故的法國(guó)學(xué)者雅克·德里達(dá)（Jacques Derrida） 的哲學(xué)觀點(diǎn)（它是一個(gè)吹牛過(guò)頭的人還是一個(gè)偉大的解構(gòu)主義者？對(duì)這個(gè)進(jìn)行討論）,，通過(guò)這些來(lái)使談話變得更有趣或通過(guò)此來(lái)排除那些與你有不同價(jià)值觀的可能成 為你另一半的人。然而，第一次約會(huì)不是為了結(jié)婚而進(jìn)行的查戶口式的談話或?qū)δ愕母星槭啡P(pán)托出的環(huán)節(jié),。切記,，這不是討論你以前的配偶或任何失敗的感情（包 括一些頭痛的事,，行李或其他發(fā)生的事件）的地方.

　　7. Don’t get too familiar.

　　不要和對(duì)方變得太熟了

　　No matter how well the date is faring (rampant hand-holding, under-the-table canoodling), projecting a conjoined future is a terribleno-no. Hints of shared summer-house rentals, baby naming, or family references (“Oh, Mother is a card. You’ll meet her soon.”) are super-creepy at this stage.

　　不論現(xiàn)在你的感情經(jīng)營(yíng)得有多好（激烈地握手,，桌下的愛(ài)撫），共同規(guī)劃未來(lái)可絕對(duì)不要做,，太可怕了,。對(duì)分?jǐn)傁奶熳夥抠M(fèi)用的提示,，給小孩子命名或其他有關(guān)家庭的信息（“嗯,，我媽是個(gè)怪人,，你很快就會(huì)見(jiàn)到她了,。”）在這個(gè)階段提出來(lái)都是非常討厭的,。

　　8. Don’t over-indulge your pop-culture passions.

　　不要過(guò)多地展露你對(duì)流行文化的癡迷

　　Must every semi-witty comment and dash of banter contain a pop-culture reference? Lightly sprinkleyour cultural quotient, yes, but too many Simpsons jokes and too deep a knowledge of Star Wars: Episode I is head-shakingly dull.

　　每一個(gè)有些詼諧的評(píng)論或帶有開(kāi)玩笑成份的話語(yǔ)都要與流行文化沾上邊嗎,？小小地展露一下你的文化智商,，是可以的,，但是太多辛普森一家似的玩笑和對(duì)星球大戰(zhàn)第一集很深層次的了解是會(huì)讓人感覺(jué)非常無(wú)趣的,。

　　9. Avoid the line-item audit.

　　不要對(duì)你的支付單上所列的物品價(jià)目斤斤計(jì)較

　　Obsessing over the price of dinner, before, during, or afterward either paints you as a worrywart who isn’t enjoying the date — or a cheapskate who isn’t enjoying the date. The host generally pays, and no one needs to hear you gripe about appetizer prices or shrimpcount.

　　對(duì)你的吃的這頓飯的價(jià)格憂心忡忡,，不管是之前還是當(dāng)時(shí)還是之后都已將你自己塑造成一個(gè)不是在享受約會(huì)而是在自尋煩惱的人或一個(gè)小氣鬼的形象,。通常,，請(qǐng)約就誰(shuí)請(qǐng)客,，而且你可沒(méi)有任何必要對(duì)開(kāi)胃菜的價(jià)格或小蝦的個(gè)數(shù)而抱怨,。

　　10. Save the souvenir photos for later.

　　保存那些紀(jì)念性的照片以后用

　　Despite advances in technology, treating your camera phone like the boardwalk kioskphoto-booth is premature, and more apt for a third date. Even worse, it gives the sense that you’re “collecting” photos of all your victims/dates. Seductive conversation trumps snapshots any day… and any night.

　 　不管現(xiàn)在的技術(shù)有多先進(jìn),，把你的可照相手機(jī)當(dāng)作是路邊的公共電話亭和公共照相亭是非常幼稚的，而且也會(huì)使人產(chǎn)生一種你還會(huì)和別人約會(huì)的感覺(jué),。更糟糕的 是,，對(duì)方可能覺(jué)得你是在“收集”所有那些已經(jīng)被你弄到手的受害者或約會(huì)對(duì)象的照片,。在約會(huì)這個(gè)問(wèn)題上,，有吸引力的談話可比任何一天或任何一晚的快照照片來(lái) 得要好。