#每個人的平等

#EachforEqual

Andi的等號手勢

Andi's hands-out equal pose

Andi媽媽的故事中英文以及配圖由Andi本人提供,，作為這項活動的發(fā)起者陶理在征得同意的基礎(chǔ)上，做了些標點符號和表達方式以及部分顏色的修改，并且做了排版,，也附上了自己的個人評論。

慢慢發(fā)現(xiàn)自己是一個對性別平等這個話題很不敏感的人,，尤其是和許多同齡女生相比的時候,，總覺得自己好像很少會遇到因為性別而被歧視或輕視的情況（但更可能是因為自己過于不敏感，所以忽視掉了很多）想了想這確實和我的成長環(huán)境有關(guān),。對我影響最大的應(yīng)該還是我媽,。我記得以前她跟我說過她小時候一直想著，長大不能成為像我外婆一樣的“受氣包”,。有一個我感觸很深的事,，是她給我講的小時候的她和我外婆之間的一段對話。

外婆是很傳統(tǒng)的賢妻良母,，外公雖然人特別好而且孝順父母,，但脾氣有些暴，有時候會對外婆嚷嚷,。受了氣的外婆不敢直接發(fā)泄出來,，有時候會去找我媽哭訴，想從自己的小棉襖女兒那里獲得一絲安慰,。

然而鋼鐵如我媽,，聽了外婆的抱怨之后直接對外婆說：“那你跟他離婚啊”。（求外婆當時的心理陰影面積...）外婆有著很傳統(tǒng)的觀念,，覺得離婚是太丟人的事情,，聽到之后嚇了一跳，也不敢哭了,，說：“離什么婚,，我就是來跟你說說，你可別亂講,！”于是又跟我媽念叨起外公的好來了,。我媽說她當時就覺得很奇怪，明明那么難受了,，為什么還要忍著,。她說她可受不了一個人這么對她嚷嚷。

這么想想,，我媽雖然是家里的長女而且有兩個弟弟,，但外公外婆從來都是最心疼她的。她聽話聰明學習好,，脾氣差的外公也從來沒有對她發(fā)過什么脾氣,。他們也都一直很支持她好好上學,，不讓她操心家務(wù)活，所以她從小會很自尊自信,。雖然看起來柔弱,，但她特別有骨氣，溫柔的她會在別人對她表示不尊重時變得非常堅決與強硬,，果斷直接地表明自己的態(tài)度和立場,。在觸及底線的事情上真的是非常剛。特別棒,。

力量無關(guān)性別或外表,，只與內(nèi)心有關(guān)。

強大不是恃強凌弱,，而是用自己的力量保護弱小,。

這是我從她身上學到的最重要的人生信條。

我愛她,。

Slowly I found myself the type of person who is not very sensitive to gender equality stuff, especially when compared with the women at my age. I always feel that I have rarely encountered the cases when I was discriminated because of my gender (but it might be the case that my insensitivity made me overlooked a lot). This should be related to my own growing environment, and my mom is the one who has the biggest impact on me. 

I remember she told me that she always thought that when she grows up, she would never become a 受氣包 (passive receiver of blames) like my grandma. When I was a child, once she recalled a conversation between my grandma and herself, that story left deep impression in my memory. 

My grandma is a traditional Chinese woman, obedient and diligent. Although my grandpa is very nice and filial to his parents, he has a bad temper. Sometimes he scolded my grandma, which made my grandma very upset and heart-broken. Once she cried and complained to my mom, hoped to receive some comfort from her lovely caring little daughter. 

However, after listening to my grandma’s complaints, my iron-like mom replied directly: “Then you should divorce him.” My grandma had a very traditional concept, holding that divorce was too shameful for a woman. She was shocked by my mom’s response and did not dare to cry, saying, “Don’t be silly, I just want to talk to you and share my feeling, stop saying this nonsense!” Then she began to talk about the virtues of my grandpa. My mom told me she was puzzled at that time. Why her mom needed to tolerant this, she could never put up with this bad behaviour from her husband.

My mom is the oldest one in her family and has two younger brothers. However, she received the most attention from her parents. She was obedient, smart and was the top student at school. Even my bad-tempered grandpa had never scolded her, and my grandparents always supported her to receive education. She grew up with astrong self-awareness and confidence. Although she looks quite fragile, she is very strong.

Although she looks quite fragile, she is very strong, she will become very firm and tough when others show disrespect to her. She will declare her attitude and position directly, making it difficult to break her bottom line, which is superb. 

Strength has nothing to do with gender or appearance, but to the heart.

Being strong is not about bullying, but about protecting.

This is one of the most important life lessons I have learned from my mom.

I love her. 

我一直都覺得我從這位緊急聯(lián)系人身上感受到最多的就是溫暖與接納,。這段故事也是我們周五討論后她完成的"作業(yè)"?？匆娝窒淼倪@個故事更堅定地感受到：女孩能成長成什么樣,，有什么觀點，和她自身的成長經(jīng)歷中有沒有被性別所限過有關(guān),。

我真心希望有更多的女孩子可以不用對性別議題敏感,，因為她們的父母以及身邊的人都是首先就把她看作是一個擁有各種可能性的人來看，沒有性別設(shè)定與期待,。

I have always feel the most kindness and acceptance from my emergency contact. The story is her "homework" after our discussion this Friday. Seeing the story she shares helps me confirm that: What kind of woman a girl would grow up into, the opinion she can have would have connection to her experience of gender limitation or not.

I sincerely hope more and more girls do not need to be sensitive of the gender issues, as their parents and people around her first consider she is a human being with all possibilities, not expecting or setting limits because of her gender.